ON MY OWN

Last Friday was my official first day complete alone! No kids were home sick, Mike was out of town, I didn't have any appointments to make or bills to pay. I didn't know what to do with myself! Literally! I found myself thinking about a puppy. I caught my snap though when my mind started drifting to potty training and long trips....

So far Johnny has missed one day a week, due to something (last week was a really bad cough, one week it was chemo, and the other weeks it was doctor visits). I told the office ladies at their school we are off to a rocky start -- hopefully it will get better. I am amazed that Johnny hasn't had a hospital stay since he started school. emergency room visit -- no overnighters.

Sunday was another grom contest. The waves were pretty big actually, and there was a STRONG CURRENT ripping down the coast.
I think the boys were a little freaked out by it, so Mikey stood out at their breaks to boost their confidence. Joey placed 1st in his first heat, Johnny second.

For the finals, Joey got third (Mikey and I think he was at least second). Johnny WON first place in his division! WOO HOO, two times in a row for the little grom. They are both stoked, and ready for the contest next weekend -- if there are waves. I think Sophie wants to start too, I told her next year, that way we can build her confidence up over the summer.

Johnny's next office visit is Wednesday -- I will update more later!

SO FAR, SO GOOD...

FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL



MY NEW MUG!



Monday was clinic day and Johnny's counts were amazing -- really, even for him. His ANC was 5,670, HGB was 11.7, and platelets were well within the normal range. Weird. So weird that when I asked for his counts (I always have to get them before the doctor's come in), and Robin printed them off, she did a double take to make sure she printed up the right kid, then once she confirmed it's the right Johnny, checked the date. We both looked at each other puzzled, shrugged our shoulders and decided to take the counts as is!

I have to admit I was extremely relieved. I have been keeping updated on some kids going through really tough times (as in the doctor's have told them they have done all they can...), and it suddenly hit me it could happen to Johnny. I haven't been reading about other kids lately because we have been doing so well and I didn't want to get "distracted" (think: depressed) about other families and all the other thoughts that go along with it (i.e., what if it happens to us, why is it happening to them, etc.,). But I read about this little girl and her struggle/battle with ALL, and my mind started wandering in a very dangerous place the night before the clinic visit. I was worried because Johnny had the sniffles (yes, the sniffles), and thought that he hasn't been his crazy, non-stop, runs-on-a-motor, self. Then that morning he came to me and said that his pants were too tight. I immediately thought of the night he was diagnosed when the doctor told me she could feel his liver and spleen. I was practically in tears up until the time I got his counts. WHEW! Thankfully they were great. Then I thought how stupid I was for getting myself all worked up, and letting my mind/imagination get the best of me.

With all of that said, he is doing fine despite the heavy chemo on Monday. I think it finally hit him tonight, about 6pm he asked me to give him a bath and wanted to eat his dinner in bed. Of course I told him, "make your own damn dinner...", I'M KIDDING, I'M KIDDING.... . We'll see how he feels in the morning, he has the "chemo shiners" under his eyes and is being really nice to everyone, so I know he feels sorta under the weather.

Joey had his first play on Monday as well. He was Abe Lincoln (I made the costume out of a "Bloody Scream Face" Halloween costume -- sans the bloody face -- although that would be appropriate for scenes at the Ford Theater...). He looked great, knew his lines, we got there early and then my "Mother of the Year" nomination moment -- the batteries in the camera were dead. To my defense, I did bring the video camera and got the entire play. He really did well too, and I'm not just saying that because he's my first born son, he spoke loudly, clearly and slow enough we could understand him (most kids just say their lines as fast as they can to get off the stage). He didn't even look nervous! I asked him on the way home if he wants to do future plays and he said with a very serious face "NO way, I was so scared...".

OTHER UPDATES:
My last blood donation made me a ONE GALLON DONOR! WOO HOO! I remember when Kathleen came in from work one day and proudly showed me her commemorative "1 Gallon" donation mug and all I could think about was opening my fridge at home and seeing a milk container full of blood, and pushing it to the side to get to the double stuff oreos. Now all I think about is the person(s) I am saving. It's funny to think what a profound difference it makes in a complete strangers life... I told Johnny about my "milestone", and he said "One gallon?! That's it? You need to donate more..." Ahh, words of wisdom from the mouths of babes. I wanted to tell him "Go ask DAD how many gallons he donated. Oh wait. That's right. He fainted the first time he donated..."

But I digress... Since we have been speakers for the blood center over the past year we have had some pretty cool opportunities. Labor day weekend we did a piece for Channel 11 and the Gulf Coast Regional Blood Center's big drive. A reporter came to the house to get our story on how important donations are to our family. Then the Blood Center asked me to come down to the blood drive to do a live segment. Sure -- why not. If you want to see my 15 seconds of fame clip, you can go to gooddayhouston.com, scroll down to "blood drive", then just click.

Other random TV adventures:
A few months ago the Chronicle did a piece on Johnny, Deluxe and his skateboard, a producer from Channel 2 read it, and wanted to do a story about them. Tonight, it aired. They did a wonderful job talking about Deluxe and what an inspiration Johnny is. I wish there was a little more of Joey in the clips, but maybe next time. It should be on their website tomorrow if you want to check it out go to: click2houstonl.com.

That's about it for now. Sorry it took so long to update, I have been OBSESSED with getting the house painted. I think today was the first day in many, that I'm not covered with paint. I still painted, just now long enough to get messy....

FREE AT LAST! FREE AT LAST! ...well almost...

Sophie started pre school on Wednesday! WOO HOO! The school is amazing -- this is how imagined pre school should be. Cooking classes, science labs, dance class, she loves it. Mike was home on Wednesday so we took the boys to school, went to Starbucks, then dropped off Sophie.

We were home by 9:30am or so, and I started cleaning the boys room and organizing (or trying to make sense of it all). After about an hour, I wasn't sure if I was organizing their toys or making it worse. I was taking my time because, well, I COULD.

Then the phone rang, the caller ID read GISD elementary. Crap. Johnny's sick. I answered it and it was the school nurse. She said that Johnny came in with a tummy ache, crying, and after about 30 minutes felt well enough to join his class. We talked, (of course he had no fever), and discovered that it was anxiety. The night before he told me that he cried all day at school and that he didn't want to go back. I thought he was being dramatic, and sent him on his way the next day. Turns out, he was crying at school. Poor thing. I called the clinic to ask for advice -- do I pick him up from school or let him tough it out? After talking to the social worker, I went to get him. That is what I wanted to do the second the nurse told me he was crying. Mike didn't want to set a precedence, and I was worried about that too.

I picked him up (literally), and he immediately started crying as I carried him to the car. I tried to ask him what the problem was, but it was too hard for him to articulate his feelings. I took him to Sonic, got him some lunch and we chatted. He's doing fine in class, as a matter of fact, he's one of the smartest kids in 3rd grade (of course!). I thought it was the pressure of doing well, and getting good grades that made him upset.

Turns out he just misses me.

Really, for the past 16 months we have been inseparable. We are always at arms length from each other 24 hours a day.

But now, he's in a new school. All of his friends are in middle school, and there are only two kids he knows at his school -- Joey, and his friend Will -- both in 5th grade.

So I talked to the counselor, his teachers, pretty much anyone that would listen, about what he's going through and if after a few weeks it's still really hard for him, we will see a counselor at the clinic.

This morning he was fine until they were walking out the door, he turned around and hugged me and started to cry. I wanted to cry too. But I didn't. We talked about the Kissing Hand book, and I printed up a couple of family pictures for him to take to school, so when he felt scared or lonely, he could look at the photos and know that I was with him. I also pick the boys up after school too. They ALWAYS complain about the smell of the fumes, and that it makes them car sick. I have to get Sophie anyway, so what;s one more stop?

Tonight Sophie had a slight fever -- 101.0, so she won't be going to school tomorrow. Alas, my freedom was short lived... Hopefully she will be well enough on Sunday to go next week!

Johnny and Joey have a surfing contest on Saturday I think, -- last weekend's contest was cancelled because it was SO FLAT. Hopefully this weekend there will be some waves for them. Boog asked the boys to join the Ohana Surf Team, Joey was stoked! Johnny was like "um, ...okay, sure...". He just wants to have fun, and be low key.

I will update more later!